Monday 7 November 2011

Irony of Falling in Love.....


Human.... is the cruelest animal of anything on this planet earth. the most selfish.. the most illogical... the most insensitive.
and not to forget to mention THE MOST CUNNING... SELFISH CREATURE. 
Some might feel.. i wrote this is a rage of anger...but NO... this isnt just Rage of Anger.. This is a mixed feeling...
Feeling pity about few circumstances today...

This is yet another writeup,  Reason : LOVESICKNESS...
Falling in love.... : THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FEELING IN THE WORLD
Defined by : God, Philosophers, General Public...

Everybody has faith in love.. It is said to be the most beautiful feeling....

But Still why FALLING IN LOVE IS BAD???
Why is it still considered as a Taboo in our society...Lets not consider, whole of the world...
lets just talk about our own INDIA...
Lets talk niche...

I am a proud Indian....Yes Truely... I love the colours in Flag... I love when the Flag is hosted...
I love when we win Wars...
I love when we are considered as the upcoming super nation....I love just everythng about it...

Is it really this??? Or is this something.... I am fed..I dont even remember since when, here are things.. I dont like... i dont love... i cant endure bout this nation.

The biggest reason out of all is the diplomacy...We think non-sense... but we pretend to talk sense.
We are still struggling with powerty,but we showoff ourselves with F1, commenwealth, and a few billiniors we have.We still have a super conservative mentality, but we name it our Culture and tradition.We can sacrifice our loved once... for our NAME in SOCIETY.

Human..comes into existance after making love...Still people FALLING IN LOVE are criticised, hated. When we get into our senses... one of the most primary things we are taught is,
We live as a family, we are relatives and we have to live together, because we love each other. The word love is arranged with every relation god "arranged" for us, sent with us.

Everybody arond is very happy, because you are a sincere son / daugter of family, you love your family the most. You love the thing... god arranged for you...

But the same relations, the same people, the same smile changes abruptly, as soon as you start loving somebody...with was not arranged for you...
Something which is not arranged, but you fall in it.

I fell in love, real love.... which people might say immature... myt consider infactuation. But when i have spent 25years of my life with ARRANGED love everywere around, how can people suspect me, when i say I m into love.
When I say, I am into love, people start giving it points, start betting bout if its real or fake,right or wrong, can be successful or unsucceful.

But i dont understand.. what is right or wrong about love?? how can love be wrong...
Love for me is... a very simple straight forward thing.. which neither have expectations nor it has any doubts.
If you are in love... you are in love!!!
whats a big deal bout it???

In INDIA..  FALLING in love is a PAGE3 thing, for general public is a TABOO...Everybody around you is ashamed, as if, its not love.. its AIDS what you have....
I gues even AIDS sounds good.
Why cant we just accept it as it is...with a smile.
Reason I found is very simple....1) society.... who wont let you..and your family live...
and wont let your younger sibiings get married.
2) Everybodyz different defination.

And India has a terrible tendency in few cases, everybody here is a self-proclaimed Doctor, teacher, preacher, and philosopher.
And hence, has all the reserved rights to prove things right or wrong.

Everybody has their own reasons, to prove it ryt / wrong, same happened with me.
The maximum I am bothered with is My maa My Paa and yaah,,,, the kind of little sis.

Papa... WHO IS STILL UNAWARE OF MY STATE...as per him,,, I guess love dosnt exists at all,,.... atlest if you do not have any achievements in life, and if you are not Ranu (by ur hard luck)
Hez bought up that ways... not his fault too....

Maa....Love now is only... what mamaji defines or sometyms Mausi,or nanaji. Else... money is the most imp factor then love.
As she says, you can live yor life, without love,,, but money gives you social status and here comes happiness along.
Therez no logic behind her this theory, other then her sufferings in life, her post marrige traumaz, for all her life staying away from my father because of her kids bright future, and still getting no rewards, to be the poorest of all the sibilings, to have to fight alone about approximately everything around, still criticisms(a typical indian women life).

SIS : My 8years younger sis.who is just a 12th passout, a teen-ager.A teen-ager..but never sounds 1....
Same as me.. more mature then she should be....Though MY FAMILY never thought I was mature,,, but yaa.. psycologist do think so.
She feels, I am wrong.... because.. my guy isnt capable to lead my life... our life... Plus.. more of a Blend of my parents thinking and her own dreams for money and a succesful lyf.

As of now.. my mother and my sister dosent have courage to face society.... once IF AT ALL I GET MARRIED.
If we talk about the topic I am abused,rude comments,and decisions are passed on.

I guess... It has more to do with Psycology, then anything else. I am forced to move on, I am forced to get married to somebody else.
I might have to kill myself for it... for their sake, I might not be ME anymore.But nobody will care, I am sure, they will be hapy all their lives tinking,
they threw me into a sack full of money, and ASSUMPTION BASED THEORY WILL BE PASSED : SHE IS HAPPY.

I might not be able to make u. I might have to lead my life their way, I might have to sacrifice my Falled love to their Arranged(which is accpted by all means.)

I will never utter a single word...will move on(as per them) silently. will never held my family / parents responsible for anything...
But yes... I just hope... A day will come.. when they will realise, Falling in love, is as good as ARRANGED LOVE.
I hope... it wont be too late.. for them to understand, for me to go back,,,, for him to trust me again...

All I think today is..ARRANGE LOVE IS ALL PEOPLE CONSIDER IN INDIA EVEN NOW( 1 of the reasons for not liking India).....and...


FALLING IN LOVE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FEELING BUT IRONICAL...



PS: This is a feel of anybody struggling in love... to get in it.. or to get out of it...

Thursday 15 September 2011

I never felt this way before...


I dont know... what this feeling is called...
All i know its a strange feeling...
I m smiling all the way..
I have been smiling all the day...
I jumped and jumped and jumped...
and screamed on the road...
people looked at me..
but i just passed a grin...
i m not embarsd... rather i m blushing...
as if they know.. what i have been thinking..
i m not just happy...
but the feel is so different...

I dont know... what this feeling is called...
All i know its a strange feeling...

i never felt this way before...

Thursday 8 September 2011

FOS...


Kisi baat ko dil se nahi lagata,
Bina javab die hasta jata hai...
Chahe kitni bhi gaali pade,
Fir bhi jo kaam pe aata hai...
Boss ho chahe client ho,
Vo bas ok sir kehta jata hai...
Chahe dating ho ya driving ho,
Uska phone bhi chalta jata hai...
Chahe barish gire ya dhoop pade,
Vo bas kaam hi karta hai...
Chhe bukhar me ho tadap raha,
Aaram nahi kar pata hai...
Kitna bhi vo kaam kare,
Wah wahi nahi vo pata hai...
Sabse kam tankhah pake bhi,
Muh pe shikan nahi dikhlata hai...
Kabhi hotel me kabhi sadak pe,
Vada-pao khake reh jata hai...
Kabhi jeb me paise na ho to,
Ciggratte se hi kaam chalata hai...
Kahbi utha ke bhari dabbe,
Sadko pe chalta jata hai...
Kabhi kabhi apni halat pe,
Khud hi jo sharmata hai...
Apni naukari bachane ko vo,
Darjano ko bevakoof banata hai...
Usi ke bal pe company chale,
Par ant me khud hi doob jata hai...
Uski chahe koi na sune,
Vo sabki sunta jata hai...
Raat ko yaaron ki toli me,
Masti se gaane gaata hai...
Subah reporting sham reporting,
9 se 9 ki naukari me jo fasta hai...
Kabhi kabhi to lagta hai ki,
Insaan ke shareer me ek gadha hi basta hai...

Will Miss You...

I used to miss the hours, which is now going to be days…
Love and more the fights, which we did always…
Killing the time is now going to get tougher…
To whom will I say , you are my bloody bugger…?
The roads the malls the lifts…
Even my bike reminds me of you…
Once you said me all of this…
I never thought it will ever turn true…
I will keep looking at phone, but it will not ring…
Who will crack the jokes on me; you are my NV king…
You are going to be now, even more far…
Y cant life be sweet, Y it has to be sour…
Thought of being so far, is turning me so numb…
People might say me mad, but I m happily your dumb!
I am not that strong, to world as I might seem …
I am crying silent tears, as I cannot scream…
I am really not sure, what’s in my tomorrow…
But today I m missing you,
And that’s my only sorrow… :(:( :(:(

SOUL AND DIVINE….

SOUL AND DIVINE….I loved u, and always wanted u to love me ...though I never said...but u realized it some how...
We both kept loving each other silently... I was too happy, as it was my dream world...in fact beyond dreams...
But destiny… one day surprisingly every thing changed...
A topsy-turvy u may say...

We departed, and after some time, departed forever...
I kept shading my tears remembering u, and each n every moment, each n every thing reminded me of only u...
Once I saw a dream... telling me...your soul has not met peace, the divine, out in that world...which is a requirement of every soul...
It made me turned blue...I became a freak thinking about it...why is it happening...tried...n tried my level best to find the reason…but couldn't find one.
And then one night…I was sleeping… n you slowly creeped in my dreams. And told me the reason... I was astonished n shocked... was that true...is it possible????
I got up in morning...don’t know...why and how I had tears had in my eyes....
I kept sitting...blank ...for some minutes...and kept thinking about the dream...I saw....Was that true...Can it be a reason...
It was driving me crazy...I was touching insanity...
How can love...????????
Then after trying a lot succeeded a bit to keep my emotions aside…and I thought rationally, n finally reached the answer...which is probably right...
Yes, he is right!!! I am the reason, because of me his soul is unable to meet the divine peace…Now I am feeling guilt…not coz I loved you...but because I cried thinking for you, kept crying for you, without even thinking that you can also be the sufferer...
I cried remembering you and slowly I didn’t even came to know…when I stopping crying for u....and made you a reason for my every tear....and somehow it happened...I made you responsible for my tears...
And never wanted to ...but you too made yourself responsible for all my tears...and your sad soul kept searching for the solution, but didn’t got one, and finally you told me ...by coming in my dream…
Today I have realized...and now I promise… no more tears...


NOW YOU ARE RELEASED.....
GO… AND MEET THE DIVINE.....

LAUGHTER... :)


My very 1st poem..may seem bacchon types ...



Laughter is neccesary,



to hide your tears....



Laughter is necessary,


to fight with your fears....



Laughter is necessary ,



to keep yourself light...



Laughter is necessary ,



to stay away from fight...



Laughter is necessary ,



to make you delight....



Laughter is necessary ,
to feel that you hav life...



KEEP LAUGHING...KEEP ENJOYING LIFE...



Chalte chalte...


Aasma me dekha abhi,
ek sitara toot gaya....
chalte chalte bich safar me,
ek sahara chut gaya....


tavajjo di thi zindagi me usko bahut,
dariya to vahi thi..bas kinara tha door gaya...


chalte chalte biich safar me...ek sahara toot gaya...


hum to bharosa kie baithe the mukaddar pe hamare,
par vo mukaddar-e-zalim bhi hamse rooth gaya...


chalte chalte biich safar me...ek sahara toot gaya...


zindagi maut ka mohtaj nahi hai pyar hamara,
hame to ye yaad hai..shayad khuda ye bhul gaya...

chalte chalte biich safar me...
ek sahara chut gaya...

Jeet...

Zindagi...


Jane kiska intazaar karti hai zindagi...



har pal kyu bekaraar karti hai zindagi...



ye hame bhi hai pata vo vapas na ayenge..



fir bhi kyu unhi se pyar karti hai zindagi..






Har lamha mujhe ashq deti hai zindagi..



fir bhi muskurane ko kehti hai zindagi..



har kisi ko muqammal jahan nahi milta..



yehi haske mujhse kehti hai zindagi...






Ansuon k samandar me beh chali ye zindagi..



aur kisi ka sahara de chali na zindagi..



mujhse hai bair tera keh rahi hai zindagi..



jiitna hai ab mujhe,main keh rahi hu zindagi...


....


Zindagi me saath ko tere,
maine koi koshish chodi na thi,
wade sare kie the poore,
koi kadi tooti chodi na thi..


Har pal saath nibhaya tha,
har mushkil ki thi aasan,
har khushi me thi saath tumhare,
har gam me aansu bahaya tha..


Har mod pe bas kaante hi the,
jinhe par karke main aage badi,
tere saath ko main bas tere liye,
har ek rishte ki sooli chadi..


Ma roi thi chillayi thi,
jag hasai jo maine karayi thi,
main na mani thi jo thani,
bas tere liye thi deewani..


Ek din aya sapna toota,
kismat ne jab mujhko loota,
tu bich rah par chod chala,
judi hui kadiyan tod chala..


Meri galti thi ya na thi,
mujhe pata nahi kya khata rahi,
par aaj khata ye karti hu,
teri yad me pal pal marti hu...

Aakhiri Saans...




Zindagi aur maut me ,

kuch palon ka faasla,


maine mehsoos kia hai....



Vo har pal ka zindagi ban jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....



Vo baba ke gale me dukh se baat atak jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....



Vo amma ka budhape me toot k jhar jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo papa ka shunya me taankte reh jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo maa ki aankho se chup chup k aansu behna,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo aakhiri palon me dosto ka hasna hasana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo pyar ki ankho me soonapan bas jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo har pal k saath dhadkane bad jana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....



Vo apna dard kisi ko na bata pana,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo aakhiri saanso ka ragon me behna,

maine mehsoos kia hai....




Vo har pal ka marna...aur fir samhalna,

maine mehsoos kia hai....

Beti ki Bhavnaa...

Main hi kyu parayi ki ja rahi hu maa,
bhaiya bhi to teri hi kokh se janma hai na maa,

main to hamesha se teri rajkumari thi na,
aaj kaise tune moh tyag dia maa,

maine apni zindagi k sapne dekhne shuru hi kiye the,
tune unhe kaanch ki ratah tod dia maa,

socha tha teri seva karke khushi dungi tujhe,
tune ye mauka mujhse kyu chin lia maa,

har pal tere daaman me chupne ki adat hai mujhe,
tune kaise apna daman mujhse chin lia maa,

jab bhi main darti hu tera haath pakadti hu,
tune kaise mujhe paraye haathon me saup dia maa,

bachpan se tune kaha main hu teri apni,
aaj kyon tune ye sabit nahi kia maa,



us anjane mahol me mujhe har pal teri yaad aayegi,
kya tune bhi kabhi ye socha hai maa,



ye parayepan ka ehsaas mujhe khaye ja raha hai,
kya tera pyaar bas ek dikhava tha maa...
 
 

Forever....



I loved you a lott,but never said..
I realise now,that I was mad..


You too knew,that I used to lie..


Always used to make ur bheja fry..


I can never forget the days spent with you..


Those were the days of enjoyment and love flue..


Every single moment I remember even now..


I used to b the bully & u used to b d cow..


The love the fight every now n then..


Never thought fighting where n when..


The never ending gossips and laughter we had..


You used to appreciate what I used to hate..


I never thought that we will depart..


But destiny worked on its part..


You always asked do "I" want "You" to die..


I said "Ya sure!! Oh my cutie pie"..


I never wanted my words to come true..


But god taught me a lesson by calling you..


Today I regret but you are not there..


Even today I laugh but inside have no flair..

Every laugh of mine reminds me of you..


I'll keep my promises as I always do..


I'v made you my present you are not my past..


My love for you will never last...